I did competitive gymnastics for about 10 or 11 years when I was younger. Quite often at a competition, they would give out ribbons up to 15th or 20th place. Depending on the event, 1st place would get a gold medal or blue ribbon, 2nd place received a silver medal or red ribbon, and 3rd place was awarded with a bronze medal or yellow ribbon. Then depending on the venue, 4th place might have received a pink or purple ribbon or some other color they chose to give out. Often, 4th place and up would receive a rainbow colored ribbon. I always felt disappointed in myself when I would receive those ribbons - Well, okay, if I'm being honest here, I was slightly disappointed with anything less than a gold medal or blue ribbon. If I placed lower than 5th though, I didn't feel worthy of an award. The reason I felt that way was because I knew that I was capable of better.
I do want to clarify here that I feel this mindset should be adjusted accordingly for the individual. If a child has struggled really hard in a certain area in the past and they make an improvement, that should definitely be celebrated. I just personally feel that we encourage mediocrity by doling out awards for just showing up and filling a spot. We should encourage greatness on an individual level for everyone; child, teenager, adult, etc. I'll go further even, to say that we should expect greatness from our children, family members, and friends (meaning that we expect them to live up to their own full potential). We should explain to our children how proud a big accomplishment that took hard work to achieve can make them feel. Why should we sugar coat it when our loved ones fail (I can't reiterate enough that when I say fail, I mean that they have not lived up to their own full potential). Why is it a faux pas to tell them they didn't do their best and encourage them to try harder next time? I for one would rather be told the full truth than to be told an altered version of it that someone thinks will make me feel better. When I was in gymnastics, for example, I used to get angry when my parents would tell me "You did your best and that's what matters." when I knew I hadn't done my best.
Recently I've heard stories about "participation" awards. I'm going to be very frank here and say that I believe these awards are ridiculous. Even as a child, I understood that they meant nothing except to send the message, "Here's an award. Please don't be sad that you didn't win". The very definition of award negates the idea of a participation award. "award: (noun) something that is conferred or bestowed especially on the basis of merit or need. (Merriam-Webster)" I honestly believe no good will come from giving out these "awards" because they eliminate an incentive for working hard to achieve a goal.
Overall, I strongly agree with the idea of keeping a growth mindset. I see no reason not to think this way and behave in a way that reflects a desire for ultimate personal greatness. I think we should encourage our children and everyone around us to think the same way in anyway we possibly can. I feel like I did a pretty good job of this already, even before I knew what the "growth mindset" was. For instance, there have been semesters where I was told a particular teacher was a "sure A" and I took a different section, because I wanted to actually challenge myself to learn. I really wish more people would maintain this mentality and challenge themselves and others. Just imagine what kind of place this world could be if everyone strove to be the very best version of themselves.
As I was writing this post an episode of Spongebob SquarePants came to mind (yes, I am almost 27 years old and I still watch SpongeBob). Patrick Star, Spongebob's best friend accidentally received an award that was meant for Spongbob but he didn't realize it wasn't for him. Once Patrick found out the award was for SpongeBob, he was very disappointed and decided to start copying everything SpongBob did in order to win an award. Eventually, SpongeBob tires of Patrick trying to imitate everything he was doing and encouraged Patrick to be himself, instead of copying someone else. Although what Patrick figures out he is best at is "doing nothing", I think the message applies very well here. The idea of the growth mindset is to strive to be the best possible version of ourselves by pushing our boundaries and reaching beyond our comfort zone.
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| (Outstanding achievement in achievement; web source, ifunny) |
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